Cell Phone Etiquette

The term "cell phone etiquette" is easy enough to Google and everyone seems to agree on what the rules are - for other people.  Here is my list.  And I actually practice what I preach.

Cell Phone Etiquette

"It is my heart-warm and world-embracing Christmas hope and aspiration that all of us, the high, the low, the rich, the poor, the admired, the despised, the loved, the hated, the civilized, the savage (every man and brother of us all throughout the whole earth), may eventually be gathered together in a heaven of everlasting rest and peace and bliss, except the inventor of the telephone."   Mark Twain

"Cell phones are the latest invention in rudeness."  ~D.H. Mondfleur

Most everyone has a cell phone these days.  They are amazingly convenient, but they can also be a serious threat to peace and harmony.  One cell phone user was reportedly beaten and his phone destroyed after he repeated refused requests by other diners of the restaurant he was in to lower his voice.  Talking or texting while driving is often cited as annoying to other drivers.  Ringtones which are too loud or too long can irritate people nearby.  Phones going off during movies or meetings are also cause for irritation.  And with the advent of the I-Phone teachers are complaining that students are texting, surfing the web, emailing and watching online movies during class.  As a result, cell phone rage is the newest rage, right after road rage. 

The problem of inappropriate cell phone use has become so profound that an illegal jammer has been created to terminate phone calls within a 30 foot radius.  Businesses are using them to jam cell phone usage by annoying customers and to end calls by employees who should be working.  Private citizens are using it to "hang up" phone calls of annoying callers next to them.  However, the jammer also jams all phone calls in a 30 foot radius, so some innocent bystanders have their call ended as well.

Like road rage, the observation of a few rules of cell phone etiquette would take into consideration the rights of other people to peace and quiet and smooth a lot of ruffled feathers.  There are many lists of cell phone etiquette on the web.  These are just mine:

1.  Location

There is a proper place and time for using the cell phone.  Phone calls should be conducted in a private place.  No one wants to hear your personal conversations.  Observe the 10 foot (3 feet) rule.  If you are within 10 feet of another person, you are too close to talk on the phone without invading their space.

Small spaces, crowded spaces or typically quiet spaces are not appropriate places for talking on your cell phone.  Any place where your conversation could disturb the activity of others should not be used for phone calls.  Any place people should expect to enjoy peace and quiet should not be used for phone conversations.

Texting in dark places where the lighted screen could be a distraction and should also be avoided.  Texting should also be avoided in places where you could be expected to pay attention; i.e. a meeting, a place of worship or a wedding. 

Examples of places where cell phone use is likely to annoy others are:

• Libraries
• Bookstores
• Restaurants or coffee shops
• Buses, subways, rails or other forms of public transportation
• Bathrooms
• Gyms
• Saunas
• Meetings
• Movies
• Waiting Rooms
• Hallways
• Places of worship
• Museums
• Concerts or other live performances
• Art galleries
• Observatories
• Lectures
• Someone else's office or home
• In waiting lines
• Grocery stores
• Classrooms
• Weddings
• Funerals
• Job interviews (yes, I've seen people do this)

2.  If You Have to Take a Call

There are some calls you simply cannot afford to miss.  When you have a sick child and are waiting for the pediatrician to call back you really have to take the call.  When your boss calls, most people have to take the call.  But there is a polite way to do it.

Tell the person that you are with that you are waiting for the doctor to call, then you will turn the phone off.  This lets them know that you are aware that this is an intrusion, you will keep it as brief as possible, and then you will turn the phone off.  When the call comes, excuse yourself.  Move to an area that is private and located away from other people to take the call.  Be brief.  Complete your business, then return to what you were doing.  If you cannot move away from other people, keep your voice low and the call short. 

3.  Talking or Texting or Emailing or Watching Videos or Surfing the Web while Driving

Just don't do it.  Most people can't manage to drive as it is.  (Well I'm in Texas.)  Doing something distracting while driving is just suicidal.  It's not only unsafe for you and drivers around you it's annoying.  It's soooo obvious when someone is distracted by talking or texting while driving.  If the call is that important please pull over. 

4.  Ringtones

Ringtones which are too long or too loud can be annoying or even startling.  If you must leave your phone on, consider others when you choose your ringtones and set an appropriate volume level. 

5. Face Offs

Stopping a face to face conversation to take a call is just rude and annoying.  Don't do it.  People should be more important than your phone.  Texting, emailing, web surfing or movie watching while on a date, out to dinner, or while talking to someone else is also rude.

6.  Can You Hear Me Now????

Lower your voice.  It is not necessary to scream into your cell phone, unless you are trying to talk over an activity going on around you or trying to be heard over other people.  If that is the case, it should be a good indicator that you are talking in a place you shouldn't.  I've been on the bus with people who talked so loudly on their phones that I could not drown it out, even with my headphones on.  And they weren't even sitting right next to me.  They were several rows away!  That's just too loud.

7.  Covert Photos

Taking photos of people without permission is simply bad form.  The one exception, which I loved, was the girl being groped by a pervert on the subway.  She filmed the behavior and got a facial shot which the police used to arrest him.  Now that is a good use for a camera phone.  Other than that, please respect the privacy of others.  You would think it would go without saying that private places like locker rooms, bathrooms and swimming pools are off limits for photo ops, but apparently not.  Don't do it.

8. Personal Information

I actually sat on the bus and listened to a woman give her name, date of birth, Social Security number, bank account number, address and phone number to a customer service rep.  She then proceeded to discuss, in detail, a problem with a transaction.  What else would you need to steal her identity?  Be aware of personal information you are giving out while in public.

9. Hospitals and Airplanes

Please be especially aware of the rules for cell phone usage in these two areas as both use equipment which might be negatively impacted by cell phone use at the wrong time or in the wrong place.  If rules aren't posted, ask. 

 

Comments

[Rick Belden]

I bet you're gonna get a lot of comments on this post! Here are a couple of examples of poor cell phone etiquette from my own experience:

* a coworker in a nearby cubicle whose ring tone, "Amazing Grace" played by an army of bagpipers, blasted away at what was apparently the highest possible volume setting every time he received a call.

* a boss who frequently interrupted team meetings for up to five minutes at a time (or more) to take personal calls from her teenage daughters while a captive audience (her staff) squirmed, watched the clock, and waited for her to finish.

That kind of cell phone collateral damage is bad enough, but I think I'm most annoyed when I'm trying to have a conversation with a cell phone user who's clearly doing (or trying to do) something else at the same time ... making a sandwich, washing dishes, driving, etc. I can almost hear the sound of the other person's mind wandering in and out of the conversation. It's like talking with someone who's half asleep.

Aside from its obvious usefulness in emergencies, I think the cell phone may be the biggest setback for human consciousness and self-awareness since the television, another technology with some positive attributes that's been used, for the most part, as an electro narcotic.

[jss]

The great thing about cell phones is that now we can get a blow by blow of a person's movements as they go about their daily, mundane, business.

Here is a conversation I overheard while sitting on an airplane as people boarded (I kid you not):
"Uh huh, I'm getting on the plane now. Yup, I'm walking down the aisle to my seat. Uh huh, I'm putting my luggage into the overhead and taking my seat now. We're supposed to be there around two, I'll call you when we land."

I could hear THAT conversation in my head. "Uh huh, we're pulling into the gate now. Yes, I'm standing up to reach for my luggage now. Yeah, I'm walking down the aisle to get off the plane. Ok I'm standing on the escalator on my way to baggage claim..."

Unbelievable.

[Kellen]

Hi Rick,

Electro narcotic. Oh I do LOVE that. That is so true and can be said of so many things. My nephews electro narcotics are his video games, which I despise. Thanks for coining the term.

I also love my cell phone for emergencies. I no longer have to worry about having car trouble out on the road and not being able to find a phone. But inconsiderations such as the ones you described almost outweigh its usefulness.

Thank you again for the lucid comments.

[Kellen]

Hi Jss,

That is exactly what Im talking about! I have to listen to these same conversations on the bus.

Im on the bus.
Were at Oltorf and Congress.
We just passed the HEB.
Im going to get off at Mary and Congress.
Yeah. I have to stop at the bank there.

And so on....

And yes, youre right. It does stick in your head. I keep hearing that even after I get off the bus. As Im listening I keep wondering, who is listening to that on the other end??? Do we not have anything better to listen to?

Thanks for the feedback.

[Dean B]

I'm getting an illegal jammer for the shelter. 30 foot radius is perfect coverage. Thanks for the tip. (I'm joking...more or less.)

[Kellen]

Ha, ha! I'm so jealous.