Trauma Tourette's
Speaking From Fear, not Fact

Resentment is Like Taking Poison...

... and Waiting for the Other Person to Die. 

I once watched a documentary on men who were wrongly imprisoned, then released many years later when DNA proved them innocent.  The man who appeared to be handling it best was the one who forgave and moved on.  He was getting married to a woman who had maintained a pen pal relationship with him while in jail.  He was working and getting on with life.   The men who were handling the worst were the once steeped in resentment who could not move on.

I worked with a woman once who was so consumed with resentment for her early family life that she was in serious danger of self destructing.  Her rage was palpable and she often turned it inward on herself. 

I'm not suggesting that you forgive and forget.  Remembering how you were hurt and understanding how you got into that situation (or were put into it) will help you avoid getting into that situation again.  Nor am I suggesting that you open yourself up for further abuse. 


If you are a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, it will help if you can find it in yourself to forgive the molester.  However, that does not mean you should be around that person if they are still behaving inappropriately or make you uncomfortable.  Nor does it mean you should not report them to the authorities if they are continuing to molest children within your family.  It does mean recognizing that they probably had this done to them and that is where they learned it.  This does not relieve them of responsiblity for their behavior, but it can bring about understanding on your part.

If you can forgive, you can leave behind a tremendous amount of baggage which will only bog you down and begin the process of rebuilding. 





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