"...and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime."
Sometimes, those of us working in the helping fields forget this. A client pulls our heartstrings and we jump in to "save" them. Now please don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that helping people is wrong. It's not. But there's a way to help people that is for them. And there is a way to help people that is more about you. It's important to know the difference.
I see a lot of parents, especially mother's who believe that the children should always come first, before themselves, before their marriage, before everything. When clients bring this belief to me, I always ask them about the safety instructions they receive when flying. Try to remember what the flight attendant said to people traveling with a small child. If the plane hits turbulence and the oxygen masks drop down, who do you put the mask on first, yourself or the child?