Kellevision

"Terror Management" or Death Anxiety or Existentialist Angst, oh my!

Well it seems that our fear of death is now being called "terror management" by social psychologists.  That sounds more like a department of Homeland Security to me.  Previously referred to as "existentialist angst" or "death anxiety" by existentialists, this is our fear of non-existence after death.  So, what is the cause of "death anxiety"?

A Case Comparison of Antidepressant Administration to Two Grieving Clients

A few years ago I was simultaneously working with two middle aged men whose wives had left them.  Both of them were completely devastated by the loss of their marriage and family.  Both of them showed serious signs of grieving.  Both of them went to their doctors, were diagnosed with "depression" and placed on medication.  It was interesting to see side by side two different ways this could play out.  For one client this was a major factor in his process of healing while for the other it significally complicated the grieving process.  What was the difference?

Warning Signs You Might have a Victim Mentality

It is important to recognize warning signs that your potential partner might be an abuser so you can avoid getting into an abusive relationship.  However, if you have a pattern of going from one abusive relationship to another it may be even more important to look at yourself.  If there are 10 people in the room and 9 of them are emotionally healthy people and one is a jerk, are you attracted to the jerk every time?  Do you always end up with jealous control freaks?  Are you always drawn to the alcoholic or the drug addict?  Maybe it's time to look at the warning signs that might indicate you have a victim mentality.

The Oxygen Mask

I see a lot of parents, especially mother's who believe that the children should always come first, before themselves, before their marriage, before everything.  When clients bring this belief to me, I always ask them about the safety instructions they receive when flying.  Try to remember what the flight attendant said to people traveling with a small child.  If the plane hits turbulence and the oxygen masks drop down, who do you put the mask on first, yourself or the child?

Parenting: Consistency vs. Rigidity

Many of the parents I work with were raised in very authoritarian homes themselves.  They are very clear that they do not want to raise their children this way.  Unfortunately, some of them confuse consistency with rigidity.  This confusion often leads to problems, including ADHD.  How?

Heavily Invested in the Victim Role

I seem to be working with several clients who are "heavily invested in the victim role" at the moment.  What does this counselor jargon mean?

How to Spot an Abuser

What kinds of behavior do you look for in a potential mate that might indicate they are an abuser?  Here are 15 behaviors which should alert you that you might be looking at an abuser. 

"The Patient is Noncompliant"

There are two terms in the medical model for treatment which really bother me.  One is "orders" and the other is "noncompliant".  Why?    

Overdiagnosing Bipolar Disorder

"A new study by Rhode Island Hospital and Brown University researchers reports that fewer than half the patients previously diagnosed with bipolar disorder received a diagnosis of bipolar disorder based on a comprehensive, psychiatric diagnostic interview--the Structured Clinical Interview for DSM-IV (SCID)." Why is this important?

"I'm Sorry - Again"

While sorry may be the hardest word for some, for women it seems to be overutilized.  Many women seem to go through the day apologizing to everyone for everything.  I watch clients, friends and family do this.  The other day I caught myself - darn it!