I'm often puzzled by the way people think about words; which words offend them and which ones they think nothing of using.
The obvious example is the "f" word. So many people are highly offended by this, even when it is used to benignly express exasperation or frustration and is not aimed at a human being (i.e."This is f*ed up!") These are not words of hate or aggression. They are someone expressing how they feel. Granted, they are expressing it in very strong terms, but these words are not aimed at anyone. This is vastly different from someone who is using words to harm.
What amazes me is when people who are so easily offended by the "f" word think nothing of using words which are directed at people in a harmful way. These same people are not "offended" by words like; stupid, dummy, fatso, loser, retard, idiot, weirdo, geek, sissy, freak, bimbo, fugly, slow poke, silly, etc. I hear parents lamblasting their children with these words everyday. I hear couples yelling these words at each other. I hear families using these words for each other. I think of Michael Jackson's self mutilation through plastic surgery because of constantly being called "big nose" by his brothers.
There is a concept in psychology called "self-fulfilling prophecy". If you tell someone their entire life that they will be a loser, they will often grow up to be a loser. The insult becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, especially if it is aimed at a child.
Abuse of any kind should not be tolerated, but in some ways I think that mental and verbal abuse has an insidious quality that physical abuse does not. Broken bones and bruises are easily recognized at being abuse. But a constant mental barrage of demeaning words is not so easy to see. And when we deem these words to be "harmless" or "inoffensive" we may not even realize that we are being abused.