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Easier said than done. When the message is strong that crying is unacceptable it becomes almost physically impossible... no matter how sad one might feel. I would even take it a (big) step further to say that living in an environment where crying is not acceptable generally means living in an environment where sadness is unacceptable. It is amazing how one can become so completely disconnected from the feeling of sadness to the point that it is unrecognizable as such.

Hi jss,

Youre absolutely right. Crying is an expression of sadness and if we deny crying we deny someones ability to express sadness. You are also right that the more we deny any emotion the less able we become to recognize it when it occurs. If, through hard work, we finally learn to recognize it, we have no experience of what to do with it. And after years of denying it, we may have years of sorrow dammed up that comes bursting forth and has ato be processed. Thats why I feel it is so important not to pass this on to our children and future generations.

Thank you, as always, for your lucid and insightful feedback.



Yet, I am one of those who will cry for days, even weeks, when sad. I WANT to be able to damn up the flow of tears. It affects every aspect of my life. I truly envy those who can, at least to some extent, hide their grief from the world.

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