The after school program called to say they had a medical emergency with a child and could not locate the mother. They were asking if we could help them find the mother and have her call them. Then the drama started...
This is NOT the way to deliver such news to a parent. First, find out the facts. The facts were that the boy had collapsed from heat and dehydration. The paramedics were called. He had been revived, hydrated and was doing fine. They were merely transporting him to the hospital as a precaution. This is what the mother should have been told.
Second, calm yourself. There is no reason for high drama, except to make yourself look like a big shot. It does nothing to help the situation or the people in it. Hysteria and drama are allllll abouttttt youuuuuu. Just don't do it. If you need to be a big shot get a hobby. Start your own company. Win a sports tournament. Do something that doesn't hurt other people. If you really want to help, stay focused on what will help the child get the care they need and help the parent calm and focus themselves so they can provide that care.
Third, start your announcement with, "Shanequa, Andrew is OK." Then follow with the facts - just the facts. "He collapsed at the after school program, but the paramedics say he is OK now. They think it was just heat and dehydration. They are just taking him to the hospital to be sure he is OK." Keep using the word "OK" and emphasizing that the child is "OK" if that is the situation. Notice the word "just". Minimize if you can, but not to the point of being dishonest. The minds of many parents will jump to their worst fear - the child is dying. Minimizing can help move the focus back to something more realistic. "They think he just got too hot and dehydrated" communicates that it's only heat and dehydration and nothing worse. If the situation is worse than expected the parent can deal with that when and if it arises. But it does nothing to exaggerate the seriousness except to derail and terrify the parent who needs to remain calm and lucid in order to think and act appropriately. Also, do not elaborate. "Heat stroke" is not the same as "heat". Stick to what you were told. Do not diagnose or add comments or opinions which are irrelevant or inflammatory. "Maybe he's having seizures!" "I had a cousin that died from that!" This is drama and does not help the parent or the situation.
Fourth, stay calm. Your calm will be contagious. It will help calm the parent and the situation. Even when there is an emergency which requires immediate action I have never seen drama and hysteria help. It only heightens people's panic. And panicked people do not move or think quickly or well. Be calm. Be direct. And be brief.
Fifth, focus on solutions. Help the parent figure out what they need to do and the resources they need to do it. Help them consider other issues which might need to be addressed. "Do you know where the hospital is?" "Have you been there before?" "Where is Andrew's father?" "Where are your other children?" "Who can look after them?" "Do you have transportation?" "Where is your bus pass?" These are concrete, lucid, purposeful questions which move the parent toward acting constructively. Their first instinct may be to run to the car and start driving madly for the hospital. Help them slow down and think whether there are other children to be taken care of or other family members who can be mobilized to assist the parent.
Last, help the parent maintain their privacy and dignity. The middle of the lobby is not the place for a parent to talk to the paramedics about their child's medical incident. Take them to a calm, quiet, private place if at all possible. Even the janitor's office is better than the lobby. People who are distraught need privacy to deal with an upsetting situation. It also protects the child's information. Panicked parents may start giving the paramedics the child's date of birth, Social Security number, treating physician, medications, pharmacy and other private information over the phone. Doing this in the middle of a crowded lobby puts their child at risk for identity theft and other complications which definitely do not need to be added to the fray.
Above all - keep calm and think it through. And plan ahead. If you work in a place where incidents such as this occur, bring it up at the next staff meeting. Develop a plan for ways staff can deal with such issues. Creating a procedure for handling emergencies when people are calm can avoid situations being badly handled.
*Client names and identifying information are changed to protect confidentiality.