I'm watching the child escalate to higher and higher levels of distress while the mother drones on, completely oblivious to the cries of distress just a few feet away.
The child continues to elevate his expression of emotional distress until it finally becomes loud enough and extreme enough to draw the mother's attention away from herself and onto the child. The mother hands the child a tissue to blow his nose. The child stares back, waiting for comfort. The mother coldly stares back at him, then, content that he has stopped interrupting her with his crying returns to her story. The child, realizing he has been dismissed, returns to his lamentations, crying and begging to be picked up. He continues to escalate his behavior until he is banging his head on the table so loudly the mother cannot be heard. Only then does she stop talking and reach over to pick him up. I watch as the child is taught that his needs will not be met, his pleas will not be answered, until he reaches a certain level of distress. As the child grows up he eventually learns to skip the escalation and jump right to drama - inflicting harm on himself or threatening suicide.