Kellevision

The Advantages of Being the Scapegoat

Why would anyone want to be the scapegoat in their family?  Could being in the scapegoat role be a good thing?  Might the scapegoat of a family benefit from being scapegoated?

When one member of the family changes...

For the first post of the new year I would like to address "change".  This is a time when people often make New Year's resolutions to change behaviors they dislike.  It is important to realize the effects those changes may have on your family interactions. 

Saviors and Warriors

I watched a social worker trying to "save" a woman from a domestic violence situation.  It was disturbing to say the least.

The Hero gets Scapegoated

I'm watching a fellow staff member get Scapegoated.  You can tell she was the Hero of her family of origin and this sudden shift in roles is rocking her world.

Intellectualism as a Defense Mechanism: Creating a New Scapegoat

I'm working with a family who is going through an interesting transition as they move the Scapegoat role from one member to another and use intellectualism to do it.

"Scapegoating in Families", a Book Review

I'm reading a great book on scapegoating, "Scapegoating in Families: Intergenerational Patterns of Physical and Emotional Abuse".  The author, Vimala Pillari, does a beautiful job of describing the process by which this pattern is passed from generation to generation. 

Maintaining the Cycle of Abuse

People who were abused in their families of origin may practice the same abusive behavior towards themselves.  They may also pass it on to their children.  This creates a sick, and sometimes fatal, cycle of abuse that repeats itself generation after generation.

Escaping the Scapegoat Role: Expressing Forbidden Emotions

Another possible way that Scapegoats make themselves targets is by expressing forbidden emotions within a relationship system.

Escaping the Scapegoat Role: Blaming and Perfectionism

Another possible dynamic of a family system with a scapegoat role is that of perfection and blaming.

Relationship Patterns

If you find yourself making the same mistakes over and over you might want to look at your relationship patterns.